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'Thank
You'
(Here's a good example of what can be
achieved. To protect the innocent,
I have changed the names and some
identifying details. When you read the story, you'll know why...)
Dreams Of A Family, On Every Page
What is your name :
Janet
Who do you want the poem written for: David
Why do you want the poem written: to say thank
you for his help love and support over the last year for not giving up and
for loving me no matter how sad tearful grumpy and grumpy i have been and
how i can never find the words to express how much he will always mean to me
and how today (13th January 2006 the anniversary of the start of our
nightmare seemed like the best day to say this to him have tried to put all
the info i could mail me or call me on xxx if its too confusing or doesn't
make sense
What style of poem would you prefer (happy, sad,
romantic etc.): not sure happy but want him to know how i feel, thank
you doesn't seem to cover it
What are the key
messages you would like to send: 13th January 2005 started a
nightmare that was to continue for over 8 months my son (Sam then aged 4 who
is autistic) had fallen on the stairs and sustained bruising to his face
which looked awful someone reported it to social services and they decided
that David (my partner of almost a year at the time) had beaten Sam
social services took out a police protection order allowing them to take
custody of both Sam and his younger sister Sarah (then aged 2 1/2) Sam was
kept in hospital for tests while Sarah was taken from us screaming and
grabbing at our clothes into foster care (David at the time had said that
the image of Sarah trying to keep hold of him and creaming inconsolable will
haunt him forever) Sam was found to have no fractures or internal bleeding
etc.... and was also discharged into foster care
we attended court where social services tried to make out that I was too
interested in my relationship with David to care about my two children and
was turning a blind eye to what abuse he was putting Sam through ( Sarah is
very close to David they have what I would consider a closer relationship
than that of most girls and natural fathers although he will always be David
not Dad) the court granted a care order allowing social services to keep
custody of Sam and Sarah David had already started to being keeping notes of
conversations and started getting the advice of a solicitor (as he was
already suspicious that we weren’t being treated fairly) so we were
represented at the hearing
The solicitor wasn’t optimistic and was telling us that it would be a long
battle with no definite outcome of getting my children back
We were both interviewed by the police
when I had finally had a strategy meeting with my solicitor they too were
saying that maybe for the best I should spit with David to get Sam and Sarah
back when this was put to social services they said that this didn’t make
any difference as they thought if I had know that something untoward had
been going on
I couldn’t believe what people were thinking of me and yet at the same time
didn’t stop to think how David must be feeling he had come into our lives
almost a year earlier and happily treated two young children as his own
loving them providing for them and spending every spare minute of his free
time doing things with both Sam to ensure he got all the extra help he
needed and with Sarah making her happy and instilling her with confidence
I’d never seen in a two year old
I sunk into depression and was signed off from work closing myself off I’d
spend my time crying not being able to explain my feelings and always there
and understanding was David promising that what ever it took he would make
sure that Sam and Sarah came home
Sarah turned three in May and still I could only see them in the grotty
contact centre……. We were allowed to see Sarah on her birthday and granted
just an extra half hour with her so we tried to make the best of a bad
situation throwing her a party but the time ended all too quickly again
despair setting in and the only person I could truly tell how I felt was
David who felt just as upset
We sold my house as required as part of my divorce again David took over
this as was incapable of keeping on top of everything, packing up Sam and
Sarah’s bedroom was heartbreaking putting their stuff into boxes was like
saying goodbye would I get their stuff out again David found me many times
sitting in their room just crying hugging this bear or that piece of
clothing
We were told at a care review meeting where we were told of plans for the
children’s future should they not be returned to me would be for long-term
fostering by my parents but if the deemed unsuitable that adoption would be
looked at
Again despair and David trying to reassure me yet every meeting David
keeping his head an recording conversations and constantly seeking
information on procedures and support groups so we could be armed with the
most amount of information as to what and how tricky/unorthodox social
services could be
Sams treatment in foster care was dire it seemed that no one would believe
he had special needs and was putting his behaviour down to the way he had
been treated he regressed to acting it was said like a nine month old baby
after contact sessions with myself apparently he would return to the foster
carers and lie on the floor sucking his toes asking for mummy he regressed
to wetting and soiling himself at home and at school seeking comfort and
cuddles from teachers as he obviously wasn’t getting this at the foster
carers
David changed jobs taking on a managers position in a busy restaurant so
that he was supporting both of us as I was still signed off and on heavy
antidepressants which made me sleep I lived just for the contact sessions
otherwise I would be asleep or reading David tried his best to keep my
spirits up taking me away to Alton towers to try and take my mind of things
but he said for every glimpse of a smile was followed by hours of a deep
thoughtful quiet face we spent all free time with me constantly calling from
work to check how I was and on occasion having to call into work as he
thought I was too distressed to be left alone
Health visitors school teachers and paediatricians were behind us confirming
Sams behaviour his clumsiness’ and even Davids support and the children’s
feelings for him but still wasn’t enough for the children to come home a
finding of fact hearing was scheduled for June this we were told would take
5 days and at the end a judge would decide what he thought had happened to
Sam and an outcome for their future would be decided
As supportive as David was he did on occasion try to deter me from staying
with him saying that again I would have a better chance of getting Sam and
Sarah back f I wasn’t with him talk got silly with David saying that he
would gladly do anything including admitting to something he didn’t do in
order for Sam and Sarah to come home
David took time from work to prepare his own case spending hours at his
computer day and night typing up recordings and pulling together all the
evidence that he has been compiling to finish 107 page statement which
highlighted everything from the teachers confirming certain bruises Sam had
before the fall to explaining how Sam fell and the pattern of Sams behaviour
this in comparison the my statement compiled by a solicitor at just 3 pages
long
The hearing was awful listening to experts give their opinions against us
saying how they thought David had kicked or punched Sam to result in the
injuries he had neglecting the fact again on Sams autism and communication
problems
On the second day of the hearing David lost his legal aid and so with it
went his representation he didn’t give up he knew the case inside out had
all the documents filed and took to representing himself having to cross
examine witnesses and experts
At the end of the hearing the judge said he needed time to consider all the
evidence and that we would be contacted when we had to return
Again David still trying to keep my spirits up constantly planning a weekend
away with his parents to take my mind of things
It turned out that the day after we would return we would be back in court
for the verdict
The weekend was heartbreaking David telling me that if the judge ruled
against him that he would leave as that would give me the best chance of
getting Sam and Sarah back the drive back from Plymouth was exhausting
mostly because David kept having to stop to console me us both in tears
unsure of what the next day would bring
Upon being called into court I couldn’t look at David thinking of this goes
wrong this guy who loves me and both my children will be gone as someone
hasn’t believed the truth
The judge ruled that he didn’t see that either David or myself had done
anything untoward to Sam and that the local authority/ children’s services
needed to look at giving the children back( instant tears from myself and
when I looked at David I saw the same
We were both ecstatic Davids words were our family will be back together
We thought that again would be a long wait as formalities etc but it turned
out they were returned to us on Sams 5th birthday the 20th august (over 8
months after our nightmare started)
We had a party and even Sams school teacher attended
Things have been tough but David has been my tower of strength supporting me
keeping me sane and not giving up when it would have been very easy for him
to walk away they weren’t his kids and being accused of something so
horrible must have been awful I know that without him I would have given up
and probably done something stupid but also all the input at the hearing was
invaluable he was commended by other barristers and solicitors’ how thorough
he was and that he proved some very valuable turning points to the judge
We have since moved again to a new house for a fresh start for all of us Sam
is getting more of the help he needs
Sarah is besotted with David although she does get worried if he doesn’t
come home on time in case in her eyes he’s left her
And me….. I'm getting back on track with Davids help I have a new job two
happy children and someone who I know no matter what will be there for me
and love me
I wish I could repay all that he has done in the last year but want to say a
special thank you for keeping our family together and how much I’ll always
love him no matter what happens
Do you have any funny, sad, happy, embarrassing or
otherwise memorable moments that you would like to share: we met by
accident via email in 2004 started chatting online and then developed into
him asking if he could call me we had chatted online from 9pm till 3 in the
morning then he called me and we stayed on the phone till 10.00 the next day
he then came down from Manchester to take me out and things progressed from
there to where he was permanently living with me in Northampton by august
even suprising me with taking me to Athens for the Olympics to watch the
gymnastics which id been dreaming of since the age of nine i had no idea of
anything till arrival at the airport where i though we were collecting car
parts. something i think even on my deathbed i'll look back and remember
what he did to make one of my dreams come true
Please choose which package you would prefer:
Deluxe
Will you require the original handwritten drafts?:
Yes
Do you have any last comments or thoughts:
don't want anything about god in it were not really religious
Dreams Of A Family, On Every Page
Yes, thirteen is an unlucky
number,
and in January, more so,
and now, one year forward and
down the track,
there are a few things that yes,
you should know:
As I just wanted to thank you, so
much,
thanks for your magical love and
support,
I don't think I would have made
it without you,
and just for a moment, please
hold that thought:
Thanks David, for not giving up
on me,
even when I was tearful, grumpy,
sad,
I can never express just what you
mean,
you're the best friend this girl
has ever had.
You'd came into our lives,
you gave it all,
you treated Sam and Sarah as
your own,
I know you gave them both
great confidence,
they are grateful for the
love that you've shown.
I'm not going to relive the
nightmare,
because it was just a horrible
dream,
but through it all, you stood by
me,
you proved to the world we really
are a team.
There are scenes that will haunt
us forever,
Sarah
screaming and grabbing at our clothes,
but now we should forgive those
who trespassed,
more the sensible thing to do, I
suppose.
Because we can't change the past,
that is done,
but the future, there's a story
to be told,
I know who I'll love beyond
forever,
yes, it'll be you when I am gray
and old.
You truly are my hero, shining
knight,
you were there for me, on your
trusted steed,
and when I was friendless, I felt
alone,
you gave me more love than I'll
ever need.
Couldn't believe what people were
thinking,
but I didn't stop to think how
you felt,
because at times, I was just on
my knees,
if I believed, there were times
that I knelt.
But along the way, I sank, then
deeper,
and that dank blanket hung over
my head,
I'd spend my time crying,
sleeping, sighing,
but you knew just what needed to
be said.
I'll never forget Sarah's third
birthday,
grotty contact centre, etched in
my mind,
made the best of a bad situation,
how could life be so cruel, so
unkind?
As soon as it had ended, sank
again,
this time, I went to the depths
of despair,
and even though you felt equally
upset,
there was my true friend, David,
standing there.
Packing up the house tore my
heart in two,
you found me many times in tragic
tears,
our hopes had started to quietly
fade,
and those horrid months seemed as
many years.
But you kept the hope alive,
dream intact,
your jaw was set in a
determined grin,
and even though Sam was going backwards,
you never lost the faith,
one day, we'd win.
You became a manager while I slept,
so you had to manage the job
and me,
and for every glimpse of a brief
smile,
hours, a deep face, dreams of a
family.
The hearing was scheduled for
June, 5 days,
you said on my own, have a better
chance,
know your heart was right but
that talk was silly,
as you're my partner in this
merry dance.
You took time off to spend hours
preparing,
you sat at that computer, day and
night,
one hundred and seven pages to
three,
your love shone on those pages,
burning bright.
Hearing was awful, "spurts under
pressure",
on the second day, lost your
legal aid,
but you went ahead and cross
examined,
and never a finer role has been
played.
Judge said he needed time to
consider,
to keep my chin up, you planned a
weekend,
said you would leave if the
judgment was wrong.
No! I'm going to lose my lifelong
friend!!
You kept having to stop and
console me,
we were unsure what the next day
would bring,
and when we were called into
court, I looked down,
I could lose my all, my
everything.
Thankfully, the judge had seen
common sense,
and his words brought instant
tears of relief,
"our family will be back
together"
six simple words, before, beyond belief!
And those dreams of a family came true,
Sam's
Fifth birthday, plus 8 months to the day,
and I just wanted to thank you
for being you,
and that one line leaves just
this to say:
David, you're my Olympian hero,
take a bow, come on, up on centre
stage,
because thanks to you, I'm
alive, I'm happy,
and we have dreams of a family,
on every page.
Copyright Allen Jesson :) 2006
'Janet' kindly replied:
"...its beautiful but some parts too upsetting to
want to be remembered years from now"
so we removed big chunks in the second draft
(and that became the final draft).
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